.042

dear sun,
will you keep on shining for me?

i'm growing weary of this impending doom of gloom.

my heart heavy
my feet still
my words empty
loneliness's settled

upon my heart

yet i'm praying, hopeful, ready, terrified, confused, stuck, insatiable

hollow, whole
volatile, stable

when will I be able to love again?
breathe out easily and let go?

I feel a weight pressing on my sternum, panic spreading itself throughout, like cracks in the sidewalks like my teetering legs like uncontrolled thoughts of you, of me, of you & me.

alone together forgotten

remembered
held
torn

shattered mended revived

recover me as I
recover myself in YOU, LORD.
carry, fix, mold, put a desire, flood me with your love, LORD.
it's yours.

what're five things valued?
{1} my family, immediate & extended
[2] understanding, honest, life-altering relationships/connections with people
(3) REST, tea, reading
[4] walks, nature, sunsets
{5} creativity