028.

dear dad,

i need you.
this inner sadness is aching MORE than i'd like to admit. it's this constant droll consuming all the energy i have.
the longer i sit here the more lonely i begin to feel. i need a savior, an enlightener, a peace maker, a storm calmer, i need everything i am not. my body is welling up, feeling broken, actually broken. honestly, i am bitter... angry... pessimistic that for even one minute you'll stop and take notice to my desperation. it comes in waves. i cannot get rid of this pit i feel inside. crashing over and over and over. dramatic, maybe, but i'd rather have you think that and notice because my world is spinning out of my reach. i'm no longer in control and i don't want it. i cannot grasp it the way i thought i could. i'm alone by choice, i thought it'd be easier, but i know it's not now. please help.

tears only bring temporary relief. i need you abba father i need you.